Bees!!

I LOVE spring. But there is one thing about spring, and even summer that make me wish it was fall and winter all year round. Bees!! I am terrified of them. And everyone always says to me, "it doesn't hurt that much when they sting you" but it's not the sting I'm afraid of. I am afraid of bees alive, dead, flying outside my enclosed car, or even on TV. I know, it's bad. But there is really something within me that happens when one gets near me. It's like I loose all reason! Once I was driving and there was one in my car, I let go of the steering wheel and foot off the gas and freaked out!! I mean seriously, what was I thinking! I could've hurt myself or worse someone else! Another time, Will was driving and I looked over to find one on his shoulder!! We were going approx. 50mph and I tried to jump out of the car. Needless to say I do not like bees. If I could ask God a question, I would ask Him, "why he invented bees!" I get we need them to pollenate, and for honey but couldn't just the small honey bees take care of that! We don't need the wasps, hornets, yellow jackets, bumble bees, dirt dobbers, and whatever other bees there are! Anyways, I just needed to vent on my very strong dislike of BEES!!

Scattered...

I went to a Ladies meeting at church last night. The speaker was a father in our church who has gone through an unimaginable situation and I want to share it with you.

Abel is a six year old little boy who was found to have a tumor in his belly when he was about 18 mo old. One day he was walking, laughing, and doing things a normal 18mo old does and the next he was in the hospital suffering and fighting for his life. He went in for surgery to repair what was thought to be a Wilm's tumor (which has a 95% survival rate) when things went terribly wrong. The tumor turned out to be a neuroblastoma, which has a 30% survival rate. And worse than this, during the surgery Abel's heart stopped. It took some time, along with extraordinary measures to get his heart beating again; therefore, Abel lost a substantial amount of oxygen to brain. Following the surgery, Abel's parents were told that even if he survived the cancer, he would never talk, he would never walk, feed himself, sit up, or even laugh or smile. He went St. Jude's in Memphis and underwent intensive chemotherapy and radiation. Today, Abel has been cancer free for 4 years but he is completely dependent for all care. The doctors however were wrong on one thing though. Abel has a joy that most of us have lost. He can smile and he can laugh! He loves music and repetitive noises :). Abel, along with his parents and two younger brothers are moving to Philadelphia in May so that Abel can attend the best school in the country for him to reach his maximum abilities.

As Abel's dad was telling their story and showing pictures/videos of Abel before all this happened, of his time in the hospitals, and of Abel today, my heart broke for this family. I couldn't help but think of my perfectly healthy 17mo old and how life can change in an instant. It doesn't make sense that people would have to suffer in such a way, especially an innocent little boy. But Abel's family has the most amazing testament of faith. You may think that this story would be one where the family was just so faithful throughout and never questioned anything but this is the neat part. Abel's dad talked of how our God scatters and used numerous examples in scripture of where this happened. Abel's parents were destroyed spiritually. I mean honestly how could they not be. They said how even their smallest prayers were'nt being answered. They felt so alone and wondered if God was even there. But after much prayer, diving into scripture, and encouragement from our church, this family is now using their story to share with others how they overcame such sorrow. Abel's dad went on to now say that yes our God scatters, but he also gathers. It was amazing for me personally to hear how they were absolutely broken yet their faith was miraculously restored. They took a situation that I cannot even fathom and turned it into a testimony to others.

Please pray for Abel and his family and for the lives that they will continue to touch through their story.

Settling In...

So I have been very behind in my posting but we have been incredibly busy lately. I do think things are finally starting to settle down but can I just say, "I am tired of moving!!!!" And what's worse is we will be doing it again when we move out of my parent's house and in to a house of our own! Oh well :), we are so blessed to be where we are and to have our wonderful families surrounding us.

It is so amazing being back home. I don't think it is really a reality to me yet. I still feel like I'm here for just a visit! So our plan is to live at my parent's house until we decide exactly where we want to buy a house here and we are also going back and forth on whether to continue renting the house we still own in Texas or to try and sell it (most likely for a big loss). We are not sure how long we will stay at my parents but they have graciously invited us in (and all our stuff!) until we are ready and can buy our own place. It is very strange to move back in with "mom and dad" after not only being married for 4 years but living 1000 miles away for four years. We are having to make many adjustments but are SO thankful for them.

Emma is absolutely eating up all the attention! And not to mention how spoiled she is getting by all her family! I'm sure after spending her days with just me and Annie the past seven months she is very thankful for new faces :). Once we got her room all set up, I think she kinda realized this was going to be home for now. She is changing so much everyday and is becoming such a little ham! She and I were in Hobby Lobby (oh how we've missed it!) the other day and she was in the best mood. She was riding in the cart and I would say "I love you" and she would reply with a wide open mouth wanting to kiss me :). I bet she did this twenty times. I keep trying to get her to say "i love you" back but all i get is kisses. And as much as I want her to say it back to me, I will take those precious kisses any day! It absolutely makes my heart melt. She then laid her face down on my hands on the cart and just loved me and said "ahhh." Oh man, she is the best little thing ever!! Here are a few pics of her enjoying her room at Grandma and Grandaddy's house. :)

Change Is Comin' Our Way...

Well I am finally able to publicly share what's really been going on in my life for a little over a month now. God has been greatly working in our family's life; so I will start at the beginning...(sorry for such a lengthy post)

For those that do not know, here is a little background on our family. I was born and raised in Kingsport, TN. Will was born in Spartanburg, SC and lived there until his Dad was transferred to Kingsport when he was 13 years old. We started dating when Will was 15, I was 14. We got married December of 2006 and both graduated from East Tennessee State University May of 2007. Will had already felt the call to ministry so we moved to Fort Worth, Texas July of '07 for him to attend graduate school at Southwestern Theological Baptist Seminary. While there, we lived in two different apartments and eventually built our first home. Will served as the part time children's minister at a church during seminary and Emma was born in Texas November of '09. God called us away from Texas in July of '10 and we moved to Greenville, MS where Will served as a full time children's minister. So in our four years of marriage we have moved 4 times and we are now again following God's will for our lives and are moving a 5th time :).

So here is how this all started...this past Christmas, we were in TN and a friend of my Dad's told him about a local church that was losing their youth minister and didn't know if Will may be interested. He had overheard this information at work but Dad told him that Will did children's ministry and never thought another thing about it. Well a few days later, this same friend had further looked into this particular church and found out it was in fact the children's minister they were losing. He told my Dad and my Dad told us about it. We didn't really think a whole lot about it because we had just recently moved to MS and felt this was where God wanted us to be. So Will and I discussed the situation driving home from TN but still were going back and forth on whether or not we should send our resume. Some things happened over the next few days that made us feel we should send our resume to the church in TN to see if God really may have further plans for our lives.

About a month later, we got a surprising phone call from the pastor at the church in TN. He told us that the staff had looked over about 50 resumes and Will's was the only one that all the staff had put a yes on. Over the next couple weeks, Will interviewed with the staff and the committee and they agreed to only pursue Will. Our prayer throughout the whole process was that if this was God's will for our family then he would open the doors in TN and if not He would close them. The doors were opened wide. We felt strongly that this was God's plan but didn't want to be swayed because the church was near family. But after our visit in TN, seeing the church, meeting the staff, we absolutely knew this was our future. We went in view of a call Sunday March 13th and the church overwhelmingly welcomed us in.

The entire process has moved very quickly. We are moving to TN the week of March 20th and Will starts as the new preschool and children's pastor at Boone Trail Baptist Church March 27. As excited as we are to be moving back home, our hearts are very heavy for our church in MS. It is never an easy thing to leave a church as a minister despite what many may feel. Our intentions were never to come to MS and leave so soon but we serve a God that is bigger than any of us can understand. There are several things about all this that we don't have answers for. But all we can say is we know without a doubt that it was definitely God's plan for us to be in MS and definitely His plan for us to now move on to TN. We cannot run from this no matter how difficult the road getting there may be. We know that God has great things in store for our future ministry as well as our church in MS. So as we move on towards this new phase of our lives, we are so excited to see what God has in store for us and so excited to be coming back home after four years! I would ask that you please pray for our family during this transition as there are many emotions involved, please pray for our future ministry at Boone Trail Baptist Church, and please pray for First Baptist Church Greenville, MS

Here are a few pics from our soon to be home...

I Will Rise

Two years ago today, one of the most wonderful people in my life passed away. I had never lost anyone close to me until this day and it is a day that is still very much fresh in my mind...

Will and I moved to Texas July of '07 and we found out that September that my Grandaddy had lung cancer. I tried to be so positive but statistically lung cancer is terminal. My Grandaddy was determined to beat the odds though and fought long and hard until he could not fight any longer. The cancer eventually spread to his brain as well as other parts of his body and it was more than he could overcome. With us living 1000 miles away, it was so hard. Some my say it was easier because I didn't have to witness the confusion set in, the weight gain from the steroids, the days of him sleeping constantly, and all the doctors visits yet for me, I wasn't there. I missed out on the last years of his life. And most importantly to me, I wasn't there when he took his last breath. I truly don't know that I will ever forgive myself for this. The couple weeks before he passed away, we thought it may be getting close but you never can know with these things and I was working full-time so I battled back and forth with going on to TN but decided not to and then it was too late. He made me feel like I was the most wonderful person and I know how much he loved me and I was not there for him in that moment. I thought as time went by that I would feel as if I did the right thing, the only thing I knew to do at that time, and yet I do not....I do remember the last time I saw my Grandaddy very vividly. Will's Grandmother had passed away the January before Grandaddy did so we were in TN for the funeral. Grandma and Grandaddy came and he was all dressed up in his navy sports coat with gold buttons, his red tie, and khaki dress slacks. And not matter how horrible he felt, he always had a smile on his face. I can still see it :). When he was leaving the church that night (and we were headed back to TX the next morning), there was just something that I think both of us felt when we said goodbye. We both knew that would be the last time we saw each other. Selfishly, I'm glad that is the last image I have of him and not him taking his last breath in such agony but more than anything, I wish I could go back and been there by his side.

There are many days, that I question why he was taken so soon, why my Grandma is now alone, why he never got to meet my precious baby girl. But I can rejoice in the fact that he is in heaven, praising Jesus and free of all his pain. And one day, I will see him again. There is a song by Chris Tomlin, 'I Will Rise,' that brings me such comfort when I think about Grandaddy and where he is today...

There's a peace I've come to know
Though my heart and flesh may fail
There's an anchor for my soul
I can say "It is well"

Jesus has overcome
And the grave is overwhelmed
The victory is won
He is risen from the dead

And I will rise when He calls my name
No more sorrow, no more pain
I will rise on eagles' wings
Before my God fall on my knees
And rise
I will rise

Happy St. Patrick's Day

Follower...

My precious little girl is growing up so much and developing this awesome little personality. She will do things and Will and I just look at each other with the look of "we are going to have our hands full with this one!" But we LOVE it! She is so much fun :).  Now that Emma is fully walking, in fact almost running, she is always on the go! I have been doing a lot around the house this past week (more on that in a few days...) and today I noticed that every step I took, those little feet were right behind me. I used to watch her crawl around and wonder what it would be like to have her walking with me everywhere I went. And I just love it that she loves me enough to stay right with me, is so curious to see what I'm doing and wants to be such a part of it! Not only is she following me around as fast as those little legs can take her but she is also following things that I am saying and doing and trying to do it herself.  Her new thing is "whoa!" Everything is whoa! It is so cute...we were riding in the car the other day and over and over she would say, "whoa, whoa, wwhhooaa!" And now I have noticed how much I actually say whoa myself! She has learned to fold her ams with this little sass to it, which right now is adorable but in a few years won't be so much :).  And we just can't figure out where she learned that!! If I open my mouth to put a bite of food in, brush our teeth , or yawn, she opens her mouth as wide as she can and if you even do it back once to her it becomes a game! And anytime I am brushing my teeth, she HAS to brush hers too. When I'm holding her and I pat her back, she pats mine right along with me.  Needless to say, my daughter is picking up on every little thing I say and do. I only hope that as the years go by I can always be someone in her life she strives to emulate.